No Regrets?

 

The not-so-good decisions in our lives can stay with us for years. Even after the effects have worn off, regrets can remain. Thankfully, there are steps we can take to live without regrets.

It’s easy to regret those “I can’t believe I did that” moments. And it’s not wrong to regret mistakes. However, a problem develops when regrets take control of our life.

Not-so-good decisions

Bad decisions can cause regrets. Decisions like lying, premarital sex, theft or even murder can, and most certainly should, cause regret. Whether we’re rich or poor, famous or an average Joe or Jane, we’re all susceptible to regrets when we make not-so-good decisions.

David was chosen by God to be king over Israel. God sought David specifically (Acts 13:22). Yet David made major mistakes as king—mistakes that displeased God and caused David great regret. Through his actions, David committed adultery with a faithful servant’s wife, signed that faithful servant’s death sentence to hide his own guilt and so made a widow of that servant’s wife. He broke God’s commandments and ultimately brought about the death of his own son (2 Samuel 12:9-18).

David had a legitimate reason to harbor regrets.

And unfortunately, David wasn’t the only chosen individual to make regretful decisions.

Persecutor

How would you like to be remembered as the most notorious person ever to persecute the Church?

Saul, later known as the apostle Paul, was that persecutor. Saul approved of Stephen being stoned to death and also “made havoc of the church” (Acts 8:3). Many in the early Church were imprisoned, and some were put to death, all because of Saul’s persecution (Acts 9:1; 26:10).

If anyone had a reason to be filled with lasting regret, it was the man who became the apostle Paul!

So why wasn’t he?

How did Paul surmount the regrets of his past? And how did David overcome the regretful tragedies he triggered?

Overcoming regrets

First, let’s look at David. He could have allowed the effects of his bad decisions to separate him from God—but he didn’t. David took his regrets to God.

What did David do when he had that “I can’t believe I did that” moment? David humbled himself before God. The prayer of David in Psalm 51 shows us three primary steps to removing regrets. These steps are:

• Acknowledgment: David confessed he had sinned against God. He also admitted that God was a just and blameless judge, which is important for us to remember when we suffer the consequences of our bad decisions (verses 3-4).
• Repentance: David began his prayer by asking for mercy—for forgiveness. David realized he couldn’t recover and move forward without God’s help. He needed God to cleanse him from his sin (verses 1-2). We, too, need to ask for God’s forgiveness, and the forgiveness of those affected, when we make mistakes that cause offense (1 John 1:9).
• Commitment: David asked God to deliver him from his guilt and restore his joy. In return, he would praise God’s righteousness and teach others to do the same (Psalm 51:12-15). To remove regret, we must change—be converted—and understand that our righteous Father has given us new life and then strive to become a positive example to others through our words and actions. These examples will go a long way toward helping those affected by our wrong decisions to heal and have forgiveness as well. For a better understanding of forgiveness, see the sidebar “Six Steps to Forgiveness.”

David overcame regret through his faith in God’s forgiveness and the understanding of his calling to be a righteous example to all.

From persecutor to apostle

So how did Paul live a life without unbearable regrets?

Paul acknowledged his past (1 Corinthians 15:9). He also recognized that his calling was not by his own deeds but by the “grace of God” that helped him to labor “more abundantly” (verse 10). Paul’s true repentance and acceptance of God’s Holy Spirit allowed him to see past himself—to see God’s plan for his life.

The difference between repentance and regret is that repentance leads to physical and spiritual change, while regret only leads to remorse and guilt.Without true repentance, Paul would have only been left with regret. The difference between repentance and regret is that repentance leads to physical and spiritual change, while regret only leads to remorse and guilt. “For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted” (2 Corinthians 7:10).

Paul found a way to move beyond regrets by repenting and then accepting that the old things had passed away through Jesus Christ’s forgiveness (2 Corinthians 5:16-19). Paul put his past behind him and kept his eyes on what he could change, not the things he couldn’t (Philippians 3:13).

Hope for living without regrets

The steps taken by David to overcome his regrets are the same steps taken by the apostle Paul to move beyond his past. We, too, have the ability to follow these same steps.

Yes, regrets have a way of sticking around far longer than the mistakes that cause them. Regrets can also make us feel worthless or unable to make amends. The great news is that there’s hope for moving past our regrets. We must accept the fact that we’ve messed up—that we’ve negatively affected the lives of others, our own lives and, most important, our relationship with our Father in heaven. We must ask our gracious, just Creator for forgiveness, as well as ask for forgiveness from others we’ve affected. And we must have faith in God’s mercy.

We all make bad decisions. It’s what we do afterward that determines the direction of our life. We’re not condemned to live a life of self-loathing with no hope of clemency—if, that is, we move forward, striving to be better, striving to overcome, striving to live each day as a righteous example to others. By following these steps, we can truly remove regrets.

 

Sidebar: Six Steps to Forgiveness

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you needed to ask for forgiveness from God and others? Here are a few steps to remember:

• Accept responsibility: The first step in obtaining forgiveness is admitting we did something wrong. Too often people fall into the denial or “blame game” mind-set when they do something that affects others. God’s Word tells us, “He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy” (Proverbs 28:13).
• Repent: Once we’ve admitted we made a mistake, our next step should be to go to God. Nothing is more important than letting our Father know we realize we messed up and want to be right with Him. We must express godly sorrow and ask to have our sins covered by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. To repent means to change—to show determination not to repeat the sinful thoughts and actions.
• Ask for forgiveness: Asking someone to forgive us for what might be a serious situation can be stressful and even frightening. When faced with the daunting task of asking for forgiveness, remember the words recorded by the apostle Paul: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7). Asking God for help and peace during this task can make asking others for forgiveness easier.
• Be reconciled: The act of being reconciled or making restitution is a key element to forgiveness. Scripture shows us the importance of making things right with our brother before we can have a right relationship with our Heavenly Father (Matthew 5:23-24). Restitution can take many forms. It might mean restoring money or personal property or even trying to mend the pain caused by hurtful words. Whatever can be done to correct a situation must be done, or the other person is not likely to forgive and reconcile.
• Pray for a forgiving heart: Just because we follow the previous steps doesn’t mean the person we’ve offended will be ready and willing to forgive us. It’s important to also pray for the other party to have a forgiving heart. The prayers of the righteous can have a positive effect (see our online article “Five Keys to Answered Prayers”).
• Accept the outcome: We can follow every step for forgiveness and still not be able to wipe away the hurt feelings and mistrust the other person experiences. He or she may still lack the willingness to forgive us. If this is the case, and we’ve done everything in our power to make the situation right, then the rest is up to God. God heals the brokenhearted and binds their wounds (Psalm 147:3), but everyone has the responsibility of going to God for healing. At this point our responsibility is to continue to pray for the right mind-set in everyone involved (including ourselves) and to show the right example moving forward.

Forgiveness is a godly trait. Our Father shows us forgiveness when we seek it properly, and He also provides guidance on how to give and receive forgiveness. Forgiveness is a key element of God’s plan for humanity. Study more in our online articles “How to Repent” and “What Is Forgiveness?”

Would We Forgive the Prodigal Son?

 

The parable of the prodigal son shows a forgiving father receiving his lost son back into the family. The older son was not so forgiving. What would we have done?

One of the longest parables recounted in the Gospels is the parable of the prodigal son found in Luke 15. The word prodigal (found in verse 13 of the New King James Version) is translated from a Greek word meaning wildly extravagant and indulgent. But more recent translations, such as the New King James Version, use the word lost in the subtitle to the parable to describe the son’s moral condition.

Our article “The Prodigal Son: A Parable With Overlooked Meaning” focuses on Jesus Christ’s call to repentance and God the Father’s incredible ability to forgive our sins. This article, on the other hand, considers the lessons for all of us when we contrast the older brother’s bitterness with his father’s mercy.

The setting of the parable

Prior to looking at the parable itself, we need to understand the context.

Some of those who were following Jesus were already dedicated disciples, but others were undecided. So Jesus challenged them. He explained that to become disciples, they had to be willing to love, commit to and follow Him above anything else.

He began with two analogies to illustrate the level of commitment we must have to finish our spiritual training. The first analogy describes how a builder must make sure he has the finances to build a tower, and the other shows how a king must evaluate whether his army is strong enough to go to war (Luke 14:28-32).

Verse 33 gives the level of commitment needed—total dedication to the cause.

Parables on repentance and forgiveness

The next chapter begins by mentioning deep cultural divisions within Jesus’ audience (Luke 15:1-2). Sinners and tax collectors were despised by the elite of society, yet they were the primary ones to gather around Jesus. The Pharisees and scribes—leaders in the community and teachers of the law—seemed to keep their distance as they criticized Jesus for mixing with these sinners.

Jesus Christ calls these leaders hypocrites (Greek for “play actors”). They look good on the outside, but “inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence” and self-righteousness (Matthew 23:25). His message to them was “first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside of them may be clean also” (verse 26). This would mean truly turning to God the Father in repentance.

Luke 15 first gives the parable of the lost sheep (verses 4-7) and then provides the parable of the lost coin (verses 8-10). Both show the importance of Christ’s call to “repent, and believe in the gospel” (Mark 1:15). Angels in heaven are overjoyed to see the change in a person who is coming to repentance (Luke 15:7, 10). God the Father, too, is happy and willing to accept those who repent. He is a forgiving Father!

He wants us to be forgiving. In the model prayer Jesus encourages us to call upon our Father, saying, “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12).And He wants us to be forgiving. In the model prayer Jesus encourages us to call upon our Father, saying, “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12).

So, understanding this context can help us to see the failings of the older brother in the next parable, the parable of the lost son. After all, the lessons Jesus was conveying not only applied to the Pharisees and scribes, but also to us today.

Dividing the inheritance

Luke 15:11-32 focuses on a father and his two sons, and the relationships between them. The parallel between the two sons and the two groups of listeners becomes clear as the story draws to a conclusion.

The younger son wanted to leave home and go to another land. He needed cash to move out, and so asked for the goods that fell to him. These normally would have been bestowed upon him at the time of his father’s death. But his father obliged and gave him his inheritance early. We read in verse 13 that the younger son soon “wasted his possessions with prodigal living”—a wild lifestyle.

The younger son’s attitude toward both his inheritance and his father showed a lack of maturity and wisdom, but he learned a huge lesson through the experiences that followed and finally returned home humble and repentant (verses 14-19). The father was so overjoyed when he saw his son return that he kissed him and made a sumptuous feast for him (verses 20-24).

The older son

The older son, however, was not pleased. Though all the remaining wealth of his father would be his (verse 31), he was angry that his father showed mercy to his brother, but had never given him what his brother received. In verse 29 he says, “Lo, these many years I have been serving you; I never transgressed your commandment at any time; and yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might make merry with my friends.”

The older son did not understand his compassionate father, just as the scribes and Pharisees—who maintained a righteous facade—did not understand Jesus and the Father, who had compassion for “sinners and tax collectors.”

And the elder brother showed no compassion for his younger sibling. Even before meeting him, the older son accused his younger brother of having “devoured your [his father’s] livelihood with harlots” (verse 30).

The father reminded the oldest son that he still had his inheritance. And the father made it clear that though the younger brother had squandered his portion of the family’s resources, he was to be accepted back as a member of the family (verse 32).

Like the older brother, the Pharisees and scribes acted as if they had never disobeyed the law and were God’s agents to rule over Judah. Yet Christ pointed out many times how their interpretation of the law and additions to it actually caused people to break God’s law (see Mark 7:9-13, for example). They also wanted to act as spiritual policemen by building a body of dos and don’ts to keep others from sinning.

At the end of the parable, we are not told the result of the father’s discussion with the older brother. But those sitting around Jesus, and hopefully some of the scribes and Pharisees, may have perceived how His remarks applied to them.

God can show mercy and forgiveness to people from any background if they are repentant, as the lost son certainly was.

Lessons for us

Here are three points to learn from this parable—and specifically from the failings of the older brother—to help us become more like Jesus Christ:

1. Prevention is better than cure.

James 5:19-20 encourages us to watch out for each other when one of us begins to go astray. “Brethren, if anyone among you wanders from the truth, and someone turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save a soul from death and cover a multitude of sins.”

The parable does not indicate that the older brother tried to dissuade his brother from wasting much of his life and his inheritance. But we should try—without being domineering or self-righteous—to help others avoid pitfalls that could lead them to lose their inheritance. Gentle correction can be effective when a trusting and considerate relationship is already present.

1. Christians who threw in the towel may yet return to the fold.

Galatians 6:1-2 shows how we, as Christians, should be concerned about our spiritual brothers and sisters: “Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

The older brother focused on how his brother had brought disrepute on the family name. Perhaps we have seen people leave our church family to live life in this world. What do we think of them? If they came back, how would we receive them? Would we be harsh and unforgiving toward them as the older brother was? Or will we welcome them back?

1. Our relationship with our Father is enriched through gratitude.

At one point both brothers failed to see themselves as beneficiaries of their father’s generosity, warmth and compassion. We’re told in 2 Corinthians 9:10-11 that God is the One who gives to us and helps us grow in righteousness, so that we can be “enriched in everything for all liberality, which causes thanksgiving through us to God.”

It appears that the older son felt he had experienced a hard life, with little benefit or reward. He didn’t see much, if anything, to be thankful for.

We need to maintain a loving relationship with our Father, appreciating especially how He has given us the life and example of His Son. This affects how we react to some of the difficult pressures and trials we have to face. If we accept God’s calling and become converted, our reward is waiting for us, and it is far greater than any expectations we may have for our human lives.

John 10:10-11 shows that Christ, “the good shepherd,” wants to give us an abundant life, and He has sacrificed Himself for us: “The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep.” We can be eternally grateful for such incredible gifts!

Christians and nonbelievers

The older son in the parable had a self-righteous outlook, and he couldn’t understand how his father could accept his reprobate, wasteful brother back, and even celebrate his return.

What about our outlook on those God will call to the marriage supper at the very end of this age, people from the highways and byways (Matthew 22:9-10)?

These may be individuals who have little knowledge of the Bible, or who come from an unsavory background. Longtime Christians who have “borne the burden and the heat of the day” (Matthew 20:12) may find it difficult to understand how God could be calling these people. But He will.

The older son also prejudged his brother—assuming he was unrepentant—without talking to him about his experiences in the foreign land and his reason for returning home. As Christians, we cannot afford to prejudge people we meet. Many we work with observe pagan practices and may have a very different worldview than we have. What is our daily attitude and conversation with them like? Are we like Christ, who was willing to sit and eat with “sinners and tax collectors”? God wants all sinners to repent and is delighted when they do. We should have the same mind-set as God and not assume that people will be unrepentant when they come to understand that they have not followed God’s instructions.

The attitude God wants

The difference in attitudes between the two sons, brought out by how the older son related to the lost son, is well illustrated by another of Christ’s parables.

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other men—extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I possess.’

“And the tax collector, standing afar off, would not so much as raise his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted” (Luke 18:10-14).

We need to have the humility of the repentant tax collector and the lost brother returning to his father. God works with us if we have this approach (1 Peter 5:5-7). We also must avoid the unforgiving, self-righteous attitude of the older brother. Instead, we should take our cue from our forgiving and caring Father.

If the Father lives in us (John 14:23), we will indeed be able to forgive any prodigal son that repents. (See also the article titled “The Pharisee and the Tax Collector.”)

When Forgiveness Isn’t Easy

 

We must receive God’s forgiveness! But He also tells us we must learn to forgive—even when it hurts. These concepts can help.

It’s not easy being a Christian.

But then, it wasn’t easy being Christ either. Who among us could function as well as He did, living in a world where the sinners for whom He came to die were the very ones who would kill Him! Even more amazing, as He was literally sacrificing His life, He uttered with a love and mercy we can scarcely imagine this incredible statement: “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do” (Luke 23:34).

Anyone who genuinely repents and seeks God’s blessing of forgiveness to cover his or her sins must enter into a commitment to walk in His steps, to follow His example. And sooner or later, that walk will lead you to one of life’s toughest challenges: “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12).

Many people have mouthed these words from “the Lord’s Prayer” without really dedicating themselves to actually living by them. Perhaps sensing that human tendency, after finishing this sample prayer, Jesus immediately revisited and elaborated on the weightiness of forgiveness.

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (verses 14-15). Yes, it’s that important to God!

Many trespasses are relatively easy to forgive. But what about the tough ones—when you have been terribly abused or hurt in some way, when the pain runs so deep that it’s easier to think about revenge or punishment than forgiveness?

Sin hurts people, and in a world full of sin, it’s almost inevitable that at some point we will face the spiritually tough task of trying to forgive someone with the same sincerity Jesus displayed.

God does not lay the impossible upon us—only what is right. He also promises to help us in our struggles to do what is right.

Here are three concepts to consider that may help you in your quest to do the right thing in God’s sight: to forgive when it’s really hard.

1. Hard work, time and repetition

For humans, forgiveness is often a process that requires hard work, time and repetition. We often fall short of God’s ability to say, “You are forgiven,” and have it be so—“As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103:12).

We may say that we have forgiven someone and sincerely mean it at the time, but we find that memories of the hurt crop up again and again and, with them, renewed hard feelings. It takes time—maybe weeks, months or years—and repeatedly working through the same process until the desired forgiveness settles permanently into our minds.

I once knew someone who had been deeply wounded emotionally due to enduring a long-term abusive situation. Long after extracting herself from that relationship, she grappled, understandably, with resentment. However, she also understood that resentment would grow into bitterness; and bitterness, into hatred, which, in the end, would only destroy her. Forgiveness was the only way out.

Years later she related to me how it had taken her five years—five years!—of working at it, asking God often for help to be able to forgive and not be bitter. One day, she said, she just realized, “It’s gone!” It was as though the bitterness had finally drained away and she had truly forgiven her tormenter.

This happened only because she worked hard spiritually. She knew it was the right thing to do, and she persisted. At no time did she say, “Well, this forgiveness thing just doesn’t work for me.” She kept at it, kept seeking God’s help, because she knew it was the right thing to do!

It’s easier to harbor resentment than it is to cultivate love.The process of sorting through anger and hurt and coming to the point of forgiving may take a lot of repetition and effort. It’s easier to harbor resentment than it is to cultivate love.

God says to us: “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32).

Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Yes! As this lady told me, through forgiveness she now lived with great peace of mind.

2. Forget about “forgive and forget”

We create a virtually insurmountable problem for ourselves when we believe God expects us to “forgive and forget.”

Forgiving is not the same thing as forgetting. Only God in His perfection has the capacity to not remember. As He says in Hebrews 8:12 and 10:17, “their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more.”

Yet I have talked with people burdened by carrying vivid memories of the sins of others and concluding, “I must not have forgiven them, because if I had, I would have forgotten about it.”

Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to forget a lot of the hurts in life? Maybe. But God in His wisdom created us with memory, intending that we learn how to use it to our advantage.

In fact, in numerous places in the Bible He tells us to remember, and some of those are painful recollections. For example, five times in Deuteronomy He told the Israelites to “remember that you were a slave.” Remembering their days of brutal slavery, which included the killing of their children, had to be terribly painful!

Why would God put their minds on that again? So they would not forget how He saved them! “Remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt, and the LORD your God brought you out from there by a mighty hand and by an outstretched arm” (Deuteronomy 5:15).

“Remember that you were a slave in Egypt, and you shall be careful to observe these statutes” (Deuteronomy 16:12). God’s purpose wasn’t to resurrect painful memories, but to help them learn the great lessons in life and to be careful to do what He said.

So if, in the process of striving to forgive others of their trespasses against you, you find yourself spending time dwelling on the past, that doesn’t necessarily mean you lack forgiveness.

The good news is that with true forgiveness, in time the memories of bad experiences often grow dimmer, simply because the painful wounds are no longer so easily irritated.

But does that mean you will never remember those things? Sometimes situations in life arise and memories of past, hurtful events jump back into our minds.

Whether that is good or bad depends on what we do with that memory. We may flare up emotionally, get angry again or get depressed. That’s when we have to walk back once again through the forgiveness process that we’ve been through before.

On the other hand, memory—even bad memories—can be turned into a great tool that keeps us on the straight and narrow.

For example, the apostle Paul stated in Philippians 3:13, “One thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.” The funny thing is, just a few verses earlier in the same chapter he wrote in detail about horrible things in his past, such as persecuting members of the Church—things he now considered the garbage of his life!

So had he truly forgotten “those things which are behind”? Obviously not. What he meant here is that his memories of the past motivated him to serve God, and thus he was always able to move on with his life. Memories weren’t gone, but he could tell himself, “Forget about it! It’s done; it’s over!”

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you never look back in memory, but it means you put it in its proper place. Don’t struggle with the impossible—to forgive and forget. Just forgive, and God will help you to be able to benefit from visiting the past without living in it.

3. The “forgive yourself” fallacy

What about the situations where the one who has caused you such great hurt is … you! Many people have struggled with the idea, “I know God has forgiven me, but I just can’t forgive myself.”

Interestingly, nowhere in Scripture are we told that we have to learn to forgive ourselves. That’s really a modern self-help philosophy. What God does tell us is simply this:

1. Repent and change; stop doing the things you’re doing wrong.
2. When you have repented, realize you are forgiven by God, and He has paid for and buried your past sins.
3. Then strive to forgive others as you’ve been forgiven in order to take on the mind and character of God.

God beautifully designed this process to heal us emotionally and spiritually. The key is not to forgive ourselves, but to accept the truth—accept that you are forgiven.

Remember what we read earlier in Philippians 3 about Paul’s persecuting the Church—notice he never said, “I just can’t forgive myself.” No, he recognized that he was forgiven.

We don’t make ourselves okay—God makes us okay! Every one of us carries regrets from our past—but we can never justify ourselves in some way that will undo it, rectify it and make everything as though it never happened. Only God can. Only God can forgive us.

And when He does, isn’t that good enough? Let’s not try to make ourselves bigger than God by saying, “He can forgive me, but I can’t forgive myself.” The issue is not forgiving ourselves, but accepting that we are forgiven.

Accepting God’s forgiveness is the only way to clear our path to move forward with our lives.

To forgive, divine

The English poet Alexander Pope’s famous line, “To err is human; to forgive, divine,” captures an important concept—forgiveness is based on a divine, or godly, model of behavior. Through our sins we crucified Christ, and yet God offers to forgive us. Then He tells us to extend the same graciousness to others.

Is it sometimes nearly impossibly hard? Yes. Can it be done? Yes, through His divine help. May these three points help you in the process.

Passover and Forgiveness

 

The New Testament Passover service is one of the most personal of all the Christian festivals. It also teaches a great lesson in forgiveness.

The biblical Passover is a yearly reminder of when God passed over the houses of Israel and spared their firstborn from death. The Israelites had been slaves to the Egyptians for quite a number of years before God, working through Moses, led them out of Egypt to freedom from bondage.

But something important for us to note is that after Israel was freed from the bondage of the Egyptians, they entered into a covenant with God—to obey and serve Him (Exodus 24:3-8). By entering into this covenant and coming under God’s authority, they became His servants. As God said, “For the children of Israel are servants to Me; they are My servants whom I brought out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 25:55).

Lesson for us today

Israel, however, didn’t faithfully follow God, but continued to break His laws. As we look back to that time, we can see there is a lesson for us today: After we are freed from the bondage of sin, we are also to become servants of God!

This is explained in Romans 6:16-18, 22: “Do you not know that to whom you present yourselves slaves to obey, you are that one’s slaves whom you obey, whether of sin leading to death, or of obedience leading to righteousness? But God be thanked that though you were slaves of sin, yet you obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine to which you were delivered. And having been set free from sin, you became slaves of righteousness. … But now having been set free from sin, and having become slaves of God, you have your fruit to holiness, and the end, everlasting life.”

On another occasion, Paul spoke of himself and Timothy as “bondservants of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:1). And he encouraged all Christians to think of themselves as “bondservants” of Christ (Ephesians 6:6-8).

To those of us who are living under the New Covenant, the Passover is not only a yearly reminder of the time when God released Israel from bondage in Egypt but, more importantly, a time to reflect upon the ultimate sacrifice of God’s Son and our Savior, Jesus Christ, who released us from the bondage of sin.

To truly be freed from a life of bondage to sin, we must accept the sacrifice of our Savior Jesus Christ. Only by His shed blood, the blood of the New Covenant, can we have our sins forgiven and become the bondservants of God and Christ (1 John 1:7).

What Jesus did

On the night before His crucifixion, Jesus gave His disciples the symbols of the New Covenant while sharing the Passover meal with them. Matthew, Mark, Luke and, later, the apostle Paul each wrote about these symbols in connection with Passover.

Paul’s account in 1 Corinthians 11:23-26 states, “For I received from the Lord that which I also delivered to you: that the Lord Jesus on the same night in which He was betrayed took bread; and when He had given thanks, He broke it and said, ‘Take, eat; this is My body which is broken for you; do this in remembrance of Me.’ In the same manner He also took the cup after supper, saying, ‘This cup is the new covenant in My blood. This do, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.’ For as often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death till He comes.”

Jesus often used physical things to teach spiritual truths, which His disciples frequently misunderstood. An example is when He told His disciples to “beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducees” (Matthew 16:6). The disciples thought that Jesus was talking about bread, so Christ had to explain that He was actually referring to the doctrine of the Pharisees and Sadducees (verses 11-12).

When Jesus introduced the New Covenant Passover symbols, He gave them to His disciples and then explained the spiritual meaning. He took bread, broke it, told them to eat it and explained to them that it represented His body. In a similar fashion, He took a cup of wine, telling them all to take a drink from it because it represented His blood of the New Covenant.

Foot washing

Jesus also introduced another new aspect of the New Testament Passover service: the foot washing.

John records: “Jesus … rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded. Then He came to Simon Peter. And Peter said to Him, ‘Lord, are You washing my feet?’ Jesus answered and said to him, ‘What I am doing you do not understand now, but you will know after this.’ Peter said to Him, ‘You shall never wash my feet!’ Jesus answered him, ‘If I do not wash you, you have no part with Me’” (John 13:3-8).

The foot-washing ceremony pictures the humility and service a Christian must practice. It also teaches us about our personal relationship with Jesus Christ—because Christ said that we have “no part” in Him if we neglect the foot washing.

Peter definitely wanted to have a part with Christ, so he said to Jesus: “Lord, not my feet only, but also my hands and my head!” (verse 9). Basically, Peter was telling Jesus to not just wash his feet, but to wash him all over. To this request, Jesus answered Peter, “He who is bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean” (verse 10).

Jesus knew this was the final Passover He would observe with His disciples. He knew that His hour had come and that it was time for Him to die for the sins of the world. So He told Peter and, by extension, us today, “If I do not wash you, you have no part with Me” (John 13:8).

Forgiveness

Following Christ’s example with His disciples, before we partake of the symbols of the bread and wine, members of the Church of God wash one another’s feet, symbolizing our need to be humble and serving.

John 13:12-15 continues, “So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them, ‘Do you know what I have done to you? You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you.’”

For many spiritual reasons, we are to wash each other’s feet. Not only does it remind us that Jesus Christ set us an example in all things, especially in how we are to treat and serve one another; but it also reminds us how to love one another—and love requires us to be forgiving.So, what was it that Jesus had just done to His disciples? He washed their feet. It was an act of humility with an attitude of service. He then instructed them to also wash one another’s feet—so that they would have that same humble approach toward their fellow disciples. And, by extension, one of the ways Christ’s disciples are to serve others is by loving them and forgiving them—because Christ has forgiven all of us.

Even in His instructions about prayer, Jesus said: “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:14-15). So we find that God will forgive our sins on the condition that we will forgive others.

For many spiritual reasons, we are to wash each other’s feet. Not only does it remind us that Jesus Christ set us an example in all things, especially in how we are to treat and serve one another; but it also reminds us how to love one another—and love requires us to be forgiving.

The example of Jesus

With this in mind, let’s consider the fact that shortly after Jesus spoke these words, He was taken captive, tried and put to death. Notice what Jesus said just before His death: “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do” (Luke 23:34).

Christ’s example of forgiving even the men who were torturing and killing Him is perhaps one of His hardest examples to follow. Yet we read that Stephen was strong enough to follow Christ’s lead. “And they stoned Stephen as he was calling on God and saying, ‘Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.’ Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, ‘Lord, do not charge them with this sin.’ And when he had said this, he fell asleep” (Acts 7:59-60). Stephen followed Christ’s example perfectly!

Our challenge today is to follow Christ’s example and to be willing to forgive others—even when they abuse and mistreat us. This doesn’t mean that we must accept or condone abuse; but it does mean that we choose not to hold a grudge or hard feelings toward anyone. We can do this knowing that eventually God will judge everyone for his or her actions (Romans 14:10; 2 Corinthians 5:10).

The Passover is truly one of the most personal of all the Christian festivals. At the New Testament Passover, we are reminded of Christ’s shed blood and broken body for our personal sins and take part in one of the most humbling ceremonies possible—the foot washing.